Ever Couple of Centuries
by LilikoMizu
Summary: Princess Bubblegum is worrying about her mortality. Immortal Marceline comes to stop her worries. I own nothing.


Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum stared hauntingly up at the starry heavens. Her hair was pulled back and out of her way and her absurdly large bifocals reflected the clear, yet moonless night. Her white lab coat was barely enough protection against the high up winds that blew around the pinnacle of her sweet candy castle. But she stood there, oblivious to the chill, frowning. Her brain was scrambling like a rat through a maze, racing through alley ways of possibilities and tunneling through piles of relevant theories, searching desperately for the solution to her problem: her mortality.

Nothing was scarier than facing one's own emanate death. The Lich had proven that even with her extensive spy network and defensive measures, her body and mind could be obliterated at any moment and her legacy wiped out of existance.

And what would happen to her people then? Lemongrab was the next in line for the candy kingdom throne, and thus far the ruling of his own kingdom did not inspire much confidence in the Princess. The imposter King of Ooo, might try to claim her throne. But since his escape from jail, he had yet to resurface on PB's radar. And her attempts at genetic recreation had proven unsuccessful, and to the common laymen, dangerous.

If only she and Science could come up with a completely scientific solution for immortality, she wished quietly. Then she could care for her children of the candy kingdom for all eternity.

Her mouth tugged downward at one side. It had been a fun game, creating this kingdom and ruling it. But at moments such as this, the princess felt the shadow of regret at taking on such a tremendous responsibility. She loved her people as a mother would, and as any healthy, sane mother of immature children, she found the idea of their independence and possible pain or struggle too hard to bear. And so she spied on them, manipulated them, limited their freedom, and committed immoral acts against outsiders in order to keep them safe. What other choice did she have?

And what choice did she have, but to rule them forever?

But how? How could one scientifically rule forever?

For days, weeks, months, she pondered this question. Sometimes seriously, going days without sleep or sunlight. Sometimes for fun, daydreaming in between meetings or doodling in a crossword puzzle. But always, she came up with no answer. No cheese at the end of her maze. And it drove her insane.

So she stood there, atop her candy castle, above her glittering, prospering city, thinking.

"You smell like greasy pizza, Bonnibel." A deadpan voice said.

Bonnie turned slightly, dazed at Marceline the Vampire Queen's comment. There was a bit dried drool at the corner of her mouth.

"Um, that's what I had for dinner. Er, lunch? No, breakfast. Wait, also dinner from yesterday. Yeah. Pizza." She turned back to the night sky, worried that she might have lost ground in her plight for scientific immortality.

Marceline floated over to the princess and pulled a nibbled pizza crust out of Bonnie's hair. She threw it over the edge of the tower. A bird grabbed it midair and flew off into the distance, probably to feed her babies or something.

Marceline looked at an imaginary watch on her wrist. 'Yep,' she thought, 'it's about that time.'

She looked at Princess Bubblegum, her face neutral. "Alright, Princess, let's go."

Marceline picked up Bonnibel from underneath her armpits and flew them down to the princess's balcony. The windowdoor was locked, but with a flick of her pinky, the lock came undone and she lightly kicked the door in. Bonnibel, still lost in thought, didn't notice Marceline set her on the tiled floor of her royal bathroom.

Marceline, unconcerned with PB's obliviousness, drew a hot, pink bubble bath. She lined up her needed supplies; hair products, a sponge, and a towel and then shut off the water when the tub was halfway full. She then turned to Bonnie.

"You there, Bon?" She asked floating inches from Bonnie's face.

"Yep." The princess replied distractedly.

The vampire queen shook her head and started undressing the princess. She picked up the naked pink royal girl and sat her gently in the bubbly tub. The soiled clothes were put into a laundry basket and placed outside of the princess's room for Peppermint Butler to collect.

Back in the steamy bathroom, Princess Bubblegum hadn't moved. Marceline floated over to the tub and called over a small wooden stool to sit on. She took the sponge and started washing the grease and dried sweat off of Bonnibel's candy skin. She scrubbed every inch of the inert PB.

When it came time to wash her hair, Marcy put down the sponge and placed her hand on Bonnie's shoulder. "Lay back." She commanded softly. PB did so almost unconsciously, while her conscious mind explored the comparative biology of Marceline and her immortality to the biology of a candy body, specifically her own.

Marceline scrubbed out Princess Bubblegum's long gooey hair, pulling out crumbs and dust clumps from its depths. A small red candy wrapper was found. Marceline eyed its blood-like tint, and then stuck out a fang to suck the color away. She wasn't above eating trashy food, even if the food itself had been trash.

With a firm hand, she guided P-Bubs back into a sitting position. She then began the task of shampooing, conditioning, and rinsing the spaced out princess's royal locks. A small working song came to Marceline as she massaged PB's scalp, and she hummed her way through the chore. It was a serene moment that the vampire queen took quiet pleasure out of. It had been a few decades since Bonnie and Marcy had been so calm and unguarded together.

At last, the bath was done, the water slightly cooled. Marcy stood PB up and dried her off, squeezing the water from Bonnie's hair as best she could. She left the bathroom momentarily to grab some pajamas from PB's large candy wardrobe and came back to find the Princess staring deeply into her bathroom mirror at her reflection.

"That's enough of that." Marceline said quickly, pulling the pink princess away from the mirror.

She dressed PB, then picked her up and carried her into her bedroom and laid her in the middle of her bed. Bonnibel stared through Marcy, focusing slightly on the high arched ceiling above.

Marcy inhaled deeply, preparing herself for the next step.

Hovering horizontally above Bonnie, an arm's length away, she said monotonously, "Okay, Bons, you gave me permission to do this a while back, so here goes."

She pulled her arm back and slapped the princess across the face.

"WHA?!" Bonnie cried, holding a hand to her red cheek. She turned and actually looked at Marcy for the first time that night.

"Bonnibel. It's okay. This happens every couple of centuries. I got this." Marceline said, her face neutral.

She slapped Bonnie's other cheek equally hard.

"Okay! Okay! I'm here, I got it, stop!" Bonnie half shouted, now holding both hands to her cheeks. Marceline crossed her arms over her chest, her hair floating eerily in all directions.

"I just… I was just thinking… And…" PB started, laying her arms out perpendicularly to her body to form a 'T'. Marceline reached down put her finger over Bonnie's lips.

"Shh."

"But there are things that…" Bonnie tried again. Marceline used her whole hand to cover the princess's mouth this time.

"SHHHhhhh."

"The possibilities…!" Bubblegum exclaimed, breaking Marcy's hand seal.

"Shut your food hole." The vampire queen demanded quietly. "You've already had this conversation with me. Come on, Peebs, I get it." Her eyes pierced Bonnie's. "You got stuff you want to do and not enough time to do it. Stop wasting your time worrying." She laid a gentler pat on PB's sore cheek. "Things work themselves out, whether you're around or not. No big d." She shrugged gesturing her hands outward to indicate the entire world.

Bonnibel lay on her cozy bed eyeing the thousand year old vampire before her, thinking about how her kingdom continued to function even if she worked tirelessly in her lab or was kidnapped for weeks at a time. Sure there were hazards and near catastrophic events that threatened her kingdom, but it was still alive and well.

For now, at least.

She sighed and closed her eyes. She knew she could never be 100% satisfied with the safety of her people, but for now she was too worn out from her existential crisis to continue to fester on those thoughts. She looked up at Marceline, her one immortal friend, with exhausted eyes.

"You crashin' here tonight?" She asked.

Marceline looked at the large bay windows, windows that did not have curtains adorning them.

"I could stay, just gotta be out before sunrise. You know, being undead and all." She settled in above the princess and curled into a comfy sleeping position.

She felt a hand tug at her shirt from below.

"Sleep down here." Bonnie said, intending to sound commanding.

Marcy shrugged and laid down next to Bonnie, mentally relaxing the magic that allowed her to levitate. PB pulled the covers up for both of them, and after a moment snuggled up to Marceline's side. She sniffed Marcy's shirt and sighed softly.

Marceline sat up slightly and repositioned her arm to be underneath Bonnie's head, then laid back down pulling Bonnie closer to her chest.

Soon Bonnie's breathing evened out and she faintly began to snore.

It was Marceline's turn to sigh.

"Yep. Every couple of hundred years…" She said quietly.


End file.
